UnpleasantlySexy

Fun with words...

Not much today, but I have to tell you - my word of the day on Monday was:

HETEROCLITICAL

...which, as a matter of fact, is one of the funniest words I've ever said in the workplace.

For the purposes of this blog, I will now refer to all of the women that I work with, unless they have somehow otherwise distinguished themselves, as "hens", because they all gossip behind the backs of one another, and to an outsider like myself, it sounds like a buncha hens clucking.

So, the thing that truly makes HETEROCLITICAL funny is that Creepy Guy totally pretended as though he knew what it meant all day long, but he kept saying "HETEROCLITORAL", usually to one or more of the hens that happen to float through our mailroom on their way to another "Did you hear about so-and-so...?" conversation.

Silently, and to myself, I roared a triumphant tiger's roar of victory every time he said it.

It means "abnormal", by the way.





BONUS WEIRDO MATERIAL!!!

Today, I took the elevator to our floor and, when the doors opened, Creepy Guy rushed in past me (without even letting me off!), huffing and puffing angrily, much like a wronged 4-year-old might do. I leapt off the elevator, but couldn't help watching his behavior. He bent over to the elevator buttons, still breathing in a manner befitting his level of anger, pointed his index finger, and then began furiously pounding on one of the buttons.

He must have jammed his finger on that poor button three-hundred-and-seventy-six times before the door closed. However, right before it did close, he stuck his head out and looked at me (and caught me unabashedly staring at this lunacy, I might add). He was still bent over, as he was for the mad button-pushing, but now he threw one arm out and pointed to the ceiling. He announced to me, "I'M GOING TO LUNCH!", and then began pounding on the floor button again until the door closed fully this time.

Just you wait - one day this dude's gonna assemble an uzi on his desk and lay waste to everyone in the building. Consider this an "I told you so."




S